Can I Give Up Yet?

I'm ready to throw in the towel. I just want to give up.

I can't deal with the pain, lack of sleep, feeling like crud, etc.

My clothes don't even fit anymore. Better yet this morning I ripped my shirt a little bit trying to put on deodorant because everything is so tight! Of course I still wore the shirt because I was not going to take the effort to actually pick out a new outfit that would also not fit me.

I would love to be able to actually sleep. Like not wake up every two hours to pee. Being pregnant gives rolling out of bed a whole new meaning. You really do have to roll. Then once you stand up everything slumps down and you remember the lovely pain your pelvic area is in.

Who knew being pregnant was also so unattractive. The stretch marks are overtaking my stomach. They have been all over my boobs for awhile. But now they are invading my stomach. Where my belly button was pierced looks like a root system of stretch marks. The thing that sucks about it all right now is the fact that now that I have all these lovely stretch marks I won't even look cute after I'm pregnant. Because not only will I be attempting to loose the 40 pounds I have gained I am now sporting lovely purple and red stretch marks. Goodbye bikinis I'll miss you. It's one thing to be unattractive while pregnant, but now knowing that I'll be unattractive afterward just depresses me even more.

O right depressing me. Can you say let's cry and freak out constantly? Yep. My dad said yesterday that he never had fun on our family beach trips and it took all my energy to not break out in tears in front of my parents, husband, aunt, uncle, and cousin. Also I'm pretty much just a bitch now. I'm mean to my husband about stupid stuff. And I don't want to put up with anyone's stupid stuff. O you have pain, go F yourself. O you're dealing with some family issues, get a life. Yep that's me currently. Huge, raging, emotional, fat, bitch. The end.

Please come soon Avery. I'm starting to not recognize myself.